A Seat at the Table

It was a Thursday afternoon, and I had just arrived at the retreat house after scrambling to get done all the things that have to be done before a busy mom in ministry can leave town. My teenage daughter was a hot mess, and I felt like a failure for so many reasons, but I had committed to this event, and I knew I needed to be there. When I walked into the room, my eyes fell on a long table set for dinner. It was so thoughtfully and delightfully decorated with silver chargers, pretty plates, gleaming flatware, sparkling glasses, cheerful yellow pansies placed carefully as centerpieces, and an elegantly wrapped gift at every place setting. 

I was carrying so much baggage when I got there that all I could think was, “Oh my, I am not dressed for dinner at this table, and I packed so quickly that I don’t even have anything nice to put on. I’m sure everyone won’t fit anyway, so I will just grab a seat at the bar nearby when it’s time.” And then I saw them. There were name cards at every place. I had never had a seat at the table with my name on it. But there it was, already reserved for me. I didn’t feel worthy, but there I was, taking my place at a table prepared for me. That made me think about another table over 2000 years ago, perhaps the most significant table in all of history…

Who got a seat at that table? Doubters, deniers, and even betrayers, Jesus included them all at the table of the Passover. He welcomed them despite what they had done and what He knew they would do. Thomas later doubted Him. Peter scoffed at Jesus’ prediction of his denial of Him, and deny Jesus he did only a few short hours after that last supper. When Peter’s eyes met those of Jesus, he was devastated at his failure. How could he be worthy of the bread Jesus had offered, but it was provided nonetheless. And Judas? Really? How did he merit a seat at the table?? He didn’t, but he was given one anyway. Jesus passed the bread of His body and the cup of His blood to a traitor whose heart was filled with darkness. He offered love and forgiveness down to the last second.

And what about me? I am a doubter, a denier, AND a betrayer. How is it that I am allowed at the table? I can’t buy a seat with my righteousness. Apart from Christ, I have none. I’m allowed at the table for one reason only: Jesus bought my seat. He paid for it in blood and reserved my place. He has reserved one for you too. There is a card with your name on it and a gift waiting for you. Are you coming? 

It’s a table where paupers become princes, losers become leaders, failures are forgiven, and the wretched are redeemed. So don’t worry about what to wear or what to bring; just do whatever it takes to get to the table. And come hungry! There is nothing more satisfying than the table He has prepared for you.

The Art of Celebration!

Who doesn't like a party? I'm not talking about a room full of people that makes the introvert in all of us break out into a sweat; instead, a "celebrating each other party." The kind of party where you raise your hands and vocalize a little support and encouragement to your sisters and brothers.

As an individual and leader, this wasn't always true for me. I remember a time when insecurity and isolation caused me to turn inward, and the thoughts inside my head were mostly negative about myself and others. The downward spiral affected the way I was leading the people in my sphere of influence. It was at this particularly low point in my life that I began to seek out friends, mentors, coaches, and became intentional in developing my tribe. The result of these vital celebratory relationships caused my influence to go deeper, become more comprehensive, and reach higher.

Celebrating and encouraging others is a biblical leadership principle. Proverbs 27:17 reveals, "As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another." Another biblical example of someone we want to have in our cheering section is Miriam. After the Israelites crossed the Red Sea, it was Miriam, the Prophet, that started to sing the victory song. It takes someone to be a celebratory starter and get the attention of the rest of the team. As an encourager, Miriam started to sing, "We're triumphant—the horse and the rider are thrown into the sea." Moses had just endured one of his hardest leadership moments, so I'm sure Miriam's explosion of a victory celebration was a huge morale booster.

Celebrating has a relational component. I mean, c'mon, it's really dull to celebrate by yourself. You can pretend that it's okay to have a "solo party." In reality, whenever we get that good news we've been waiting for, we want to text or call our favorite celebrator friend to share in the goodness with us.

At the leadership level, competency matters, but a relational celebration is another powerful component of the influencer's journey. Dr. Henry Cloud said that "Wisdom and competency do matter. We do need skills, knowledge, and ability … But … ask many people about their greatest accomplishment and challenges overcome, and you will find one thing in common: there was someone on the other end who made it possible."

Celebrating is attractive. I remember my mom loved to throw a party—birthday, seasonal, or let's just have a cook-out party. She would always gussy up and put on some party attire; make herself a little more attractive for the event rather than her ordinary day-to-day outfit. Think about a recent party or celebration you attended, I'm sure the host went out of their way to make the celebration a little more eye-catching. My friend, Ann, takes special care in how she sets the table, the centerpiece and place-settings are thought out and appropriately placed. What I'm trying to say is that a celebrating-each-other party should be gorgeous to the giver and the receiver.

In the alluring charm of celebrating others, here are a few observations I have made.

1.     Celebrating others will encourage them to do the same for you.

2.     Celebrating others will create a team mindset instead of individual power pats on the back.

3.     As a leader who celebrates others, we are then allowed an open the door to say the hard things to fine-tune leadership development.

4.     Being a celebrating starter is full of rewards. My friend, Jodi Detrick, calls them "first clappers and confetti throwers." 

5.     Celebrating others is as easy as giving a compliment.

“Let’s create a culture of cheering each other on!”

So, how about it, friends? Let's create a culture of cheering each other on! Take the biblical principle of commending and applauding and create a tribe where it becomes attractive and commonplace to hand out compliments and build each other up (I Thess. 5:11, NIV). Be a Miriam to a Moses and cause an outright joyous time of singing for someone in their hardest leadership moment. I believe in you. I think that the party-thrower in you is more beautiful than you will ever know. Let's start an all-out movement of exploding in celebration for one another--I'm pretty sure that joyous occasions are at the very heart of God.